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LeatherDyke Pride in Vannie & QueerErotica too

Arts & Culture, Culture & Community, Dykes, Sapphists & Other Cousins No Responses »

Jul 212009

My plan is to be an out proud homo this Pride. It will be the first spent together for me and my boi and I want to soak up all the gay I can possibly stand.

Below is a smattering of where you can expect to find me over the coming weeks, but it is in no way the full list. I’m still figuring out all the goodness for Pride in Art and picking films for Out on Screen!

Canadian Mayhem’s Bride of Pride party will of course be a highlight, and I plan to do the Dyke March and the Annual Pride Parade with the Mayhem banner. Join us as we walk? Drop a line into the comments!

How about you? If you are in and around Vancouver, what are you up to this Pride. Will I see you there?

Canadian Mayhem presents…

The Bride of Pride Party
Friday, July 31, 2009
A kinky, sexy party for all Queer Women in Vancouver

http://canadianmayhem.com

Bride of Pride is a BDSM/sex playparty for kinky women* into queer, woman-to-woman BDSM. Dress in whatever makes you feel good, bring your toys and your playpartners, and come join us! We encourage costumes and flights of fancy, but we won’t turn you away if you’re not in fetishwear! Just for fun, we’ll have a few special theme areas, like puppy play, and ageplay and wrestling space and more!

Doors 8 pm – midnight, Party until 1 am.
The WISE Hall, 1882 Adanac St, Vancouver.

*Who’s Invited:Â Â All past, present and future women, of any orientation (homo, bi, hetero, trans), who enjoy woman-to-woman kink and BDSM. Women of all experience levels are welcome! Transguys welcome!

Tickets will be $15 in advance, or $20 at the door.
Details: http://canadianmayhem.com

Dykes on Bikes @ The DykeMarch 2009

Saturday, August 1

http://www.vancouverdykemarch.com/
Gather 11:30am at the west wide of McSpadden Park.
Starts at noon.

Dykes on Bikes @ the Pride Parade 2009

Sunday, August 2

For those starting on the East Side
(Oh, the joys of the queer-women biker gang run through the heart of the city…)

Commercial and 3rd Ave. Between 10 & 10:30 arrival, leave the east end for the west end at 11 am.
Parade starts at Robson and Thurlow! http://www.vancouverpride.ca/parade-route
Offical start time is noon… bykes arrive at Robson & Thurlow at 11am (or earlier, or later).
Go to the head of the parade. No paperwork required.

Details, Parade Guidelines and BykeDykes mailing list!
http://bykedykes.vancouverleather.com/

LEATHERDYKE Post-Pride Picnic in the Park

MONDAY, August 3

4pm â€“> 8pm
Where: Trout Lake / John Hendry Park 3350 Victoria Drive, southeast corner

Highly informal. Free. All welcome. A bunch oâ€™ leatherdykes are throwing down blankets, laughs, and good company. Come on down, bring your partner/s, friends (kink-friendly), a blanket, food n drink, something to share, chairs, sunscreenâ€¦and most importantly, yourself! (*In good weather only)

http://www.vancouverleather.com/pride2009

Queerotica

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

Back again with an evening of LIVE readings of queer erotic fiction and poetry from some of Vancouver’s hottest writers!
Starts at @ 7:31pm sharp @ The Roundhouse Community Arts and Recreation Centre
Vancouver, BC, Canada as part of the Pride in Art Festival 2009

$5 (suggested donation) goes to support the artists directly!
Produced by Elaine Miller and Afuwa Granger
http://elainemiller.com/queerotica

Outing within our Culture

Culture & Community No Responses »

Jul 182009

One of the things I love about parties with a dress code is that all persons present take a ~risk~ in being there. If I see my dentist… well, then both of us are in a position to out the other. There is some safety in that.

When a member of the leather/kink/fetish “culture” engages in outing it harms ALL of us. It harms our sense of trust with one another and if it is done publicly it harms the reputation of our community. Aside from the voyeuristic horror of it, to those who are not friendly, it also suggests that part of our morally reprehensible lifestyle (yep, I heard that once) is a lack of integrity amongst ourselves. For those who have not yet made it into the fold or even to the steps of the doorway it does nothing to make things seem friendly or welcoming.

I’d like to think that we flirt consciously with danger. Having a betrayer, a snitch, a rat amongst us is not good.

A man I respect has asked about accountability for outing to presenters and organizers on Fetlife. For him it is clearly a question of community safety within our culture. I think he is onto something very knotty and difficult to unpick. How do we safe guard ourselves from those amongst us who may not have integrity or who are malicious or ambitious, etc?

I’ve seen a LOT of mouths close over the years here in Vancouver and seen those without history fall prey. I’ve stood by and let it happen I’ve stepped in and shared my knowledge. I have been inconsistent in my actions.

We ask for references for a reason. But like in a job situation, we all all likely to give those that look upon us favourably. Depending on the person being spoken about there can be some pretty careful language if there is a perceived risk to speak the truth as one knows it.

I could go on, but I’m boring myself.

I’d like to think that if a standard of behaviour was set by “community leaders” that it might be something adopted by all. My sense is that the increased interest I see in Leather, and in protocols has some link to a desire for predictable behaviour that carries with is communal consequences.

Abandoning my own blah, blah, blah…

!Kona

Scheduling the Mayhem

Canadian Mayhem, Education No Responses »

Apr 202009

Graciousness!

Have you LOOKED at all the madness going on?

I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to schedule all my costume changes NOW. There’s just so much to do! The full schedule of events is online now with more content being added all the time.

Some of the highlights include:

FetLifeâ€™s Racism Rant III

Writings on Race No Responses »

Mar 162009

So, like a fool I log on before I’ve had coffee or taken my morning shit. STOOOPID.

Some dude comes online: Some black kids in a cafeteria were using it and a white teach said she was offended and the kids looked at her…. and, what if the word in play was faggot…

So I went off and was not polite. JEH-ZUS. I’ll be a little more clear here than there. what I catually wrote is further on.

Dude: children and mad dogs get a different measuring stick than those masquerading as adults. And, Dude, is “faggot” the BEST you can do? Really? Did you think through the non-existent argument before you hit submit? Did you think we would do the work for you and just KNOW what your point was? ‘Cause in the absence of accompanying analysis… I’m judging you. Sorry. Try again. OK?

A poster brought up her position of power and how that related to her use of the word. I was thankful to her for bringing power into the conversation. Class should be there and so should geographic culture.

But ultimately this is Race 101 shit. It’s people on the playground pretending to be adults. There ain’t a lot of smart so I’m not certain why I continue to go wading. I will say that EM dived in a couple times and as always she wrote in a smart accessible way. And ya know what? Folks took it personally and DIDN’T get it. GAWD. You don’t have to agree people! Just get it and abe additive to the conversation!

I’m totally revising my egotistic view that kinksters are smarter than the average meat suit walking around out there. I did it once with a group of lesbians online and again online with a group of LeatherDykes (a lot of that is archived in this blog). My Sisterly-Frenemy FF is right and I keep wanting to deny it: folks just ain’t that bright around this. They want to ignore or forget or justify or defend or protect or whatever. There isn’t ACTUALLY a lot of good will around “gettting it”.

I tend to think that I am intermediate in an advanced world. That I have a lot to learn and there are lots of folks out there who are waaay smarter than me. I feel like I spend a lot of time trying to catch up and to be worthy to open my mouth. I’m vociferous when I speak, and often seem positional, but usually I’m just wanting people to be more clear and to intelligently back their shit. I love being wrong actually. It’s an opportunity to learn and that is porn to me. Different than office supply porn but just as powerful…

Mama is tired. And NO. Not everyone reading this gets to call me that.

Here’s want I ranted next:

Local Service Required

Uncategorized No Responses »

Mar 142009

Life support needed while working to earn the Lucre of the Realm, volunteering in community, travelling incessantly and building my empire.

Have you got what it takes? Continue reading »

FetLife's Racism Rant I

Culture & Community, Writings on Race 1 Response »

Mar 132009

A friend of mine, EM, emailed me this week to rhetorically scream about engaging in fruitless battles on FetLife. The question prompting her email? Is Poly Queer. In this case it was heterosexuals appropriating the land queers stand on. “How do I get sucked into these things?” she asked.

I read and then giggled to myself. Oh those of the majority norm… not enough of you to hang out with? Feel like you need to stand on my piece of ground too? I told her: “you get yourself into these things because you are an UPPITY queer….”

And then tonight I got a message on FetLife looking for input on a Racism thread in the FetLife Rants section. So I hand to wander over. And then I had to respond. So I did. GAWD.

——————–

Sorry Manners: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - Part II

Culture & Community, Writings on Race No Responses »

Mar 132009

From: Leather Journey

by Chris M (Black Rose) and Lady Medora (NOPE)

In fairness, we don’t want to suggest that leatherfolk are inherently rude people. The scene, as wonderful as it can be, contains many subtle and seldom discussed “stress factors” that contribute to uncivil behavior. Like water over a stone, these stress factors wear on the nerves year after year, thus setting the stage for impatience, irritation, depression, and the empathy deficit we have already discussed. These are the rudeness-producing rudeness that prompts retaliatory rudeness in return.

Leather Ethics: Civility and Incivility in the Scene

Culture & Community, Writings on Race No Responses »

Mar 132009

Do you remember when you first saw this piece? It came to me in email what seems like loooong ago. I’ve thought about this because of experiences I had at conferences I’ve been travelling to over the past year and a half. I’ve looked for a way to get permission to re-print this. I’m not convinced that it is complete. But I don’t want to loose it because I think it has some important things to say.

I try to remember that the norms of civility differ from culture to culture, continent to continent, country to country, region to region, city to city, neighbourhood to neighbourhood, and social setting to social setting. It’s hard sometimes.

But i try to keep in mind that it is not my place to impede the journey of another physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. I’m not always successful.

I am relentlessly, pathetically, gloriously, beautifully, tragically, gracefully…. human. And I strive to do the best I can each day, which sometimes ain’t a lot depending on the ruler, to be the best person I can. To be a better person as time goes by is something to strive towards.

Words like these are totally additive to that pursuit.

Snapshot of the week ending : 2009-03-02

Canadian Mayhem, Education, Reflections & Ruminations No Responses »

Mar 022009

What a week. All about prepping and going to to South Plains LeatherFest and International Master/slave weekend.

And lots of working on Mayhem. And planning MORE things like the next D/s Dinner/salon and my fourth annual Sexy Sauna B-Day Bathouse party. I seem to just keep adding things to the schedule.

The more I travel the more I am drawn to travel. the more I want to head out into the world of Leather and learn and fellowship. I am blessed.

Notes: From Top Shelf

Education, Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s No Responses »

Feb 182009

SoÂ I go to this thing which is a monthly conversation among Dominants. Frankly, it’s among males Dominants and me. Very interesting. MEN. **sigh**

It’s good because the perspective is different and as a whole this group of people has thought about things differently than I have.Â I think I have more reference points. What it does is force me to be more articulate and to be more clear. Which is always a JOY.

I certainly don’t agree with all I hear, but I do scribble away at things thatÂ I want to think more about. Sometimes they come from other people, sometimes they are thoughts of my own that come out of what is being discussed.

Things from my notes to think about behind the cut:

Info Out: Leather Leadership Conference Scholarships

Education No Responses »

Feb 032009

LLC XIII – 2009 Scholarships now available!

The board of the Leather Leadership Conference, Inc. is pleased to announce that it is offering 15 full scholarships to cover the cost of registration to the up-coming LLC-XIII in Atlanta, the weekend of April 3-5, 2009. Applications are accepted until February 24. Those awarded will be notified by March 4.

Confidential requests for scholarships may be made to scholarships@leatherleadership.org. If you have already registered for the conference, you can be reimbursed for your registration fee.

Now, having said all that, I just want to say that this is an event that I have been DYING to attend to YEARS. I’m going to apply. But it only covers registration. I’m gonna need help with transportation and accommodation too… Back to the public advisory

Where to find me in 2009...

Education, NubianImp Projects No Responses »

Jan 162009

Barely into the New Year and I’ve got many a plan up my sleeve already. Which surprises even me given the events of the fall.

In September I had major surgery (I was sick when I was at the conference) and have just returned to work now. But I’m still being a a fabulous kinky pervert!

Humour: The lazy haughty submissive

Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s No Responses »

Jan 162009

I found this on a forum I belong to: Dark Connections, which is an online Yahoo group for Black and PoC practitioners of BDSM and their allies. A lot of folks here attend the Annual Black Beat Conference every year.

Anyways… this is particularly timely given some of the conversations I’ve been having lately…

Canadian Mayhem, Education No Responses »

Jan 152009

A Weekend Event for LeatherWomen
all past, present and future women of any orientation or experience level welcome

http://canadianmayhem.com/

FetLife Validation

Culture & Community, Reflections & Ruminations No Responses »

Jan 042009

Seems like a lot of people have migrated in that direction. I’ve found myself increasingly in conversations wherein a person makes reference to or quotes FetLife or a person who posts there.

So strange.

Part of what is interesting to me is how CLEAR online space can twist the identity and purposes of who is present. There a few folks present who I have met or whom I know in real time who are making it a serious ground for ambition. Now… don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing wrong with ambition. And I have a certain respect for those who know how to play the game. It’s a voyeur sport for me. However, because I don’t play those games, when they come my way I get swallowed. I’m too blunt, clear, and truth-talking to be sly, manipulative and coy.

There a a few people I watch on there making strives, and serious gains at international attention or status. Will that work on those who know them in real life for who they are? Probably not. But for those with limited contact, it’s pretty easy to become a star or an authority through a few strokes on a keyboard. And for those who watch the rise to power regardless of their personal knowledge of where bodies are buried or what personal motives or ambitions move people… well for some of them, it’s a political move to stay quiet. And then there are the streams of toadies (hmmm… I should look up the etomology of that word before I use it hmmm?) that know and capitulate for personal gain.

Bah…. More thoughts but I’ve just bored myself.

D/s Dinner/salon #3

D/s Dinner/salons, Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s No Responses »

Nov 282008

A plan is officially afoot to do the next D/s Dinner/salon. You can expect the gathering to occur the week of December 8 in the evening – most likely a private residence.

A library of D/s and M/s books will be on hand for casual perusal, along with a high level over view of the Leather Traditions Weekend Intensive for Dominants I just completed in San Fransisco (short and sweet I promise). More details to cum.

In the meantime… Are there any thoughts about what might go on the conversational agenda? Big thinks, little thinks, personal, community…

I’d be interested in talking about:

A tool for Masters (and Dominants)

Education, Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s No Responses »

Nov 262008

This makes how many posts in one day?! YEESH! And I still haven’t written about the weekend. LOL! To come, to come, to come…

Shocked

Napping in the afternoon means a sleepless night… I came across this from the Ms Development Centre while doing some research and fell in love with the structured focus and commitment to clear framing:
Continue reading »

Leather Traditions - Weekend for Dominants Approaches

Education, Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s No Responses »

Nov 152008

I’m starting to feel excited! My first trip to San Fran!

I’ll be arriving on Thursday, November 20, for Leather Traditions, a weekend intensive for Dominants which goes from the Friday to the Sunday. It’s got an application/reference process to get in and is limited to 25 people. I think it will add greatly to my year-long commitment to focusing on and investing in the furtherance of my D/s M/s knowledge.

The list of sessions includes the kind of geeky theory that makes me wet.

My D/s Syllybus for BlackBeat

Education, Our Thoughts > D/s & M/s, Writings on Race No Responses »

Aug 112008

SO EXCITED!

Here’s my planned schedule for BlackBeat so far:
Continue reading »

Older Entries

NubianImp Projects

LeatherDyke Pride in Vannie & QueerErotica too

Canadian Mayhem presents…

Dykes on Bikes @ The DykeMarch 2009

Saturday, August 1

Dykes on Bikes @ the Pride Parade 2009

Sunday, August 2

LEATHERDYKE Post-Pride Picnic in the Park

MONDAY, August 3

Queerotica

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

Outing within our Culture

Scheduling the Mayhem

Local Service Required

Leather Ethics: Civility and Incivility in the Scene

Snapshot of the week ending : 2009-03-02

Notes: From Top Shelf

Info Out: Leather Leadership Conference Scholarships

Where to find me in 2009...

FetLife Validation

D/s Dinner/salon #3

A tool for Masters (and Dominants)

Leather Traditions - Weekend for Dominants Approaches

My D/s Syllybus for BlackBeat

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