NubianImp Projects

Those of us consciously walking a path of intentional and consistent D/s have come across times when we wonder about our personal capacities and those of the people with whom we have association. We seek inside ourselves, we go to conferences, read books, mentor, attend workshops, munches, review Leather history, research online and participate in social media networks. Those of us who are serious *work* hard. Personally, I think of it as a craft.

In the past I have asked: what does it take to do D/s successfully? How does one find and adopt best practices?

Currently I ‘m reading Malcom Gladwell’s Outliers. It’s a  fascinating read that refuses to acknowledge the rags to riches myth of success in favour of exploring their environment. Like The Tipping Point and Blink, his previous two books, he draws interesting conclusions from the connection of seemingly disparate points. I read and experience moments of AHA! whether I agree with him or not. The journey he plots is well worth walking.

Outliers has a section that talks about the energy and effort it takes to be a success given that one has *enough* talent, skill and ability – not excessive mind you, but enough – to pursue one’s passion.

In example after example he comes to a conclusion that asks: is 10,000 hours the magic number?

For those that engage in 24/7 power exchange dynamics 10,000 hours works out to  417 days. But between work and sleep and having time for family, friends and other pursuits there aren’t many who can squeeze in 5 hours a day. At that rate, the magic number takes 286 weeks or 5.5 YEARS. Think about that for a few moments. How many people do you know who can claim that kind of devotion (or fortune!).

The Geisha, understand, learn until the day they die. They take lessons constantly to gain new skills, and to maintain or enhance old ones. What do you do? How many hours have you devoted to the dynamic you have or the one you want?

This fall I’ve got a few things on my agenda:

There will be another D/s Dinner/salon in September and of course the Lee Harrington D/s Psychology Intensive (for which there are still seats).

Then I’m travelling to Wicked Womyn October 23-25. There are some good presenters and promising sessions. For example: Rope Wolfe’s Mind Fucks/Mental Games; River’s Edge of Madness, Fear and Terror Play; and Master DJ & September Dragon’s conversation about Diversity in the Master/slave Lifestyle and how gender plays a role in a variety of relationships.

My latest temptation is to attend the D/s Protocol Weekend with Laura Antoniou and Midori in Toronto November 20 – 21. It’s being billed as a weekend intensive for conscious D/s & protocol. At $450 per person, it’s a steep investment. They’ve designed for people who enjoy authentic power dynamics and D/s, who want to consciously create quality relationships that suit their personal hungers and needs in the context of the real world. Through the unique curriculum and its innovative tools, each individual or relationship unit will create their own customized manual of effective protocol, rules, etiquettes and codes of conducts.