Notes from the D/s Dinner/salon #2

One of the attendees took some notes and agreed to have them published. Wasn’t that kind?

There’s some good food for thought in them. Questions that deserve to be answered. Tasty.

Many thanks for the generosity.

“D/s is not casual” (S-d)
- not done at parties, unlike S/M
- may be a genuine struggle for a sub

Questions that a sub is in a position of influence (in reference to subs as DM’s at public parties)
- esp. in hetero kink community

“community property submissive” – assumptions around submissives

“master, slave, order(ing), whip”
- addressing issues of race and history
- Personal becomes political, political becomes personal

How do we find out inside ourselves what we need out of D/s?

What is our responsibility in D/s?
- In D/s, is it possible to rape the sub?
- willingness to stick to boundaries
- “help me look at my shit, it’s hard to figure out on my own” (-l–n-)

intention/action/effect

In the ordinary world power is always around us
- we eroticize this “stuff”
- intentional, acknowledged, eroticized (POWER IN KINK)

Where she wants to be vs. where she needs to be

“It’s all fuckin’ D/s” (S-d)

“Sometimes you can get off on the theory of what you’re doing” (S-lv-)